This is TDS…

I’m looking at the news stories coming out that the COVID-19 virus may have in fact escaped from a viral “testing” lab in China and my reaction is — Well, DUH.

One of the more frustrating things about the Trump presidency (and the COVID outbreak in specific) is how the media and Resist, Inc. were absolutely determined to discredit him every time he took in a breath to speak.

And whether such action was warranted or not the effects were cumulative and definitely self-propagating. Eventually it became vital to “fact check” and “debunk” every statement he made and nit-pick each word looking for half-truths or mis-statements.

The effect was truly damaging. Faith in his leadership was destroyed by the time the COVID outbreak started and it led to many different parallel power grabs. At the state level, governors rushed to implement policies in an attempt to demonstrate their leadership. At the federal level, career bureaucrats like Fauci rose to media stardom at breakneck speed.

And the media itself decided it would try to run the outbreak response. They started to collect data themselves and push their own recommendations and advisories as if they each were their own CDC.

All these different entities vying for power and the spotlight made Trump’s ability to manage the federal response almost impossible. And yet each day he would stand in front of the cameras and try to give updates as best he could and try to stick around to answer every question, even the mocking ones.

And of course Resist, Inc. would take his responses intentionally out of context in order to discredit him further and they’d mock him in the 24/7 news cycle to the point where the portrait and caricature of the president was seen as true and the actual was seen as mythology.

During one of those briefings the President expressed an opinion that the virus not only originated in China, but that it may have escaped from a lab in Wuhan.  He refused to say whether he believed it was intentional or accidental, but at the time the world was desperate for information about the virus and the fact that China likely had the gene sequence and wasn’t sharing it was disappointing.

China has a strong influence on American politics.  Through our entertainment industry they can influence public opinion, and through our politicians they can influence policy.  It’s the downside of being in debt to them for as much as we are.  And the Chinese government stays in power by projecting strength and (more importantly) infallibility to its people.

The “escape” of the COVID-19 virus from Wuhan was a massively embarrassing moment for the Chinese government. And they had no interest in drawing more attention to that.  Thus it became vitally important to help them “save face,” if you will, on the global stage.  Everyone knew what had happened but if you wanted their help and you wanted their involvement you best stop drawing attention to it.

So Trump was buried for his comment.  Even though we all knew that the simplest explanation was that the virus was in the lab and got out somehow.  And the compliant media was happy to accommodate the wishes of the Chinese to perpetuate the myth of “wet markets” and other such nonsense to avoid scrutiny.

And here we are a year later discovering “wow, so Trump was right after all.”  It’s frustrating for me because it’s been so obvious for so long and yet the media kept shouting “no evidence” and “unsubstantiated” and so on.  Their lack of intellectual curiosity is frankly embarrassing.

It makes me wonder.  What else was he “right after all” about?  How many things did he try to do to help us get out of this sooner and couldn’t succeed because Resist, Inc. was determined to undermine him?  At what point will we discover that we’ve been led around by the nose by unscrupulous people who just want power and the spotlight?

And, when will we demand better from our media?  When will we finally insist that they do their homework and actually investigate a topic instead of going for the emotional red-meat?

Trump was not a good president. And I have never really supported him.  But I gotta wonder if he would have done a better job if he had just gotten some support. In a lot of ways he reminds me of Captain Queeg.  Yes, the crew felt there was no other choice to save the ship, but if they had worked with him from the start and built mutual trust it never would have come to that point.

 

Providence

I haven’t written in a while to give an update of any kind. Partially because I’ve been dealing with my cancer, but also because I’m learning that it’s not always therapeutic to talk things out.

So, to catch everyone up, here’s how it’s gone:

First, my brother had a friend that went through a very similar cancer experience as I, and he put us in touch with each other.  Looking back that was the most important thing that I needed to be able to cope with my situation.  His friend told me what to expect, when to expect it, and made sure that I knew enough to ask questions myself.

Not long after my last post I learned that there was an opening and my surgery could get bumped-up a week. I had been so pensive about waiting that I was excited and relieved to be able to start sooner.

So, at the end of March I underwent the procedure.  Given the location of my tumor I required a “Lower Anterior Resection,” which sounds fancy but it is fraught with complications.  The proximity of the tumor to my rectum meant that I was going to lose a piece of it along with the diseased piece of colon.  Usually it’s customary for surgeons to re-route the small intestine out of the body to a bag (an ileostomy) so that the large intestine can heal without being used for an extended period of time.  Then once the large intestine is healed enough the small intestine is returned to it’s normal route.

The other likelihood was that the amount of rectum remaining would be insufficient for normal function, which would result in the need to route the large intestine out of the body to a bag (a colostomy).  This was unlikely but if it happened it would be permanent.

What was working in my favor was that my surgeon is an expert using robotic-assisted laproscopy.  This technique has made even complex surgeries like colectomy so much easier and have such a higher rate of success without complication.  Knowing that I would be taking advantage of these technologies was a real boost to my morale.

After doing my pre-surgery screens the day arrived and my mother and brother brought me to the hospital where the surgery would be performed.  I walked into the surgical area and calmly disrobed and was wheeled into the operating room, and I was asleep in moments.

My first memory waking up in recovery was my surgeon leaning to whisper in my left ear… “No bag,” he said.  I managed to lift up my hand for a high-five and he returned it.  I passed back out.

The next few days were spent recovering in the hospital.  I was given a private room where I could rest and watch TV and listen to podcasts.  My mom and brother visited me more than once but I spent the first two days mainly sleeping.  Nurses and techs came to check on me every hour or two.  The first night I was encouraged to stand and see if I could scoot around the room.  The next day I was encouraged to walk beyond my room.  By the third day I was walking the hallways like the mayor of my floor – greeting nurses and patients alike.

Beyond the walking my diet improved.  The first two days it was liquid only.  Broths, ginger ale, juice, jello.  By the third day I was allowed to have toast and pudding and cream of wheat and so on.  Right before they released me I was even allowed to (gasp) have eggs.  The biggest treat ever for me!

When I was discharged my brother brought me to my parents’ house and I stayed with them through Easter.  My mom at first was concerned about how she’d be able to care for me but in very little time she realized that I could manage pretty well.  The first few days I slept a lot anyway, although I always got up to have coffee with her in the morning and I made sure to take at least one long walk every day.  I was even able to use stairs without much problem, which made everyone feel more at ease.

After Easter, I finally returned to my own house.  It had been over a week since I had been there.  My brother drove me home and helped me buy groceries so that I wouldn’t need to leave the house for food.  I hunkered-down and rested as much as I could.

Each day that passed I was getting stronger and I eventually felt strong enough to try to drive my car.  I took it up the street to the store and back.  No problems at all, so the next day I drove myself to the surgeon’s office for my follow-up.  When he saw how I was doing and that I had driven myself he was delighted.

I started the next week by easing myself back into work.  My boss and I had arranged that I’d work remotely during my recovery until I was strong enough to return to the office.  Given my role in the company it’s very easy for me to do what I do from home, so this was a great opportunity to get rest when needed and work when I could.

It also afforded me the chance to visit with more doctors, including my oncologist, who as expected wanted to start me on a chemotherapy regimen as soon as possible.  Even though I was “Stage 2” I was very very late Stage 2, and the simple truth is that cancer may have already started spreading in my body at undetectable levels.  So the playbook calls for acting as if I was Stage 3 instead and go on offense.

To accomplish this I had what’s called a “port” installed near my collarbone.  It’s a reservoir-like device that is about the size of a bottle-cap from a beer.  It’s placed under the skin and it connects to the vein in my neck.  then needles and other devices could tap into the port instead of needing to fish around for a vein in my arm all the time.  It’s an incredible piece of technology that makes treatments so much more possible.

And so last week was my first round of chemo.  I spent half a day at the doctor’s office with medicine #1 dripping into the port, and then I was fitted with a pump and medicine #2 that I would carry with me for 2 days.  Again, having the port makes that so effortless.  And on the third day I returned the pump to them.  All they had to do is disconnect it from the port and I walked out. So simple.

Even though I had been taking medicine for 3 days I didn’t get walloped until day 4.  Knocked me out pretty hard.  Napped a lot, slept a lot. But eventually I came out of it and managed to function pretty well.  I was able to walk and drive and I even visited with the family for Mother’s Day.

Just this week I’ve gotten some good news too — my oncologist won’t recommend radiation after the chemo.  That was a relief to me.  I didn’t think I could handle that much abuse.  And even today my surgeon was once again thrilled with my progress at the 6-week mark.  He says I’m doing better than many at this stage, and he even cleared me to eat what I want and maybe even play golf this summer!

I titled this post “Providence” and I hope by now you see why.  I got the colonoscopy, which allowed us to discover this thing just in the nick of time.  Then my GI built my team and handed me an incredible surgeon and oncologist, all of whom are clearly invested in my success.  And then my brother knowing someone who knew exactly how to counsel me and guide me.

When I had my initial CAT scan, it was shown I was not Stage 3 yet.  When I was nervous about waiting for the surgery it was pushed up a week.  When I was praying I wouldn’t need a bag I didn’t get one.  When I hoped I’d be able to recover well and return to work and an independent life I did.  When I crossed my fingers that I wouldn’t need radiation I didn’t.  Heck, even when I hoped the bills would be covered they were (mostly).

From the moment I got the “bad” news I haven’t had anything but good news since.  This entire experience has been an endless gift from God.  Keeping my anxiety at-bay.  Helping me heal.  Giving me positive news when I need it, and strength to handle the endless visits and procedures.  All of it comes from Him.

I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to repay the blessings I’ve been given.  Or how I can make myself worthy of them.  But I know that for the remainder of my life I’ll try.  Because I believe I was spared certain death. 

Thanks for listening.